“Straddling Two Cultures, Conditioning Love” Published on India Currents

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Image Credit: India Currents “Self Love”

Love is felt deep and love is felt light. It is felt in its absence and in presence. It is present whether you are aware or unaware. This is a story & journey of Love, how I discovered its true meaning, some of it through my own living and some from observing others. This is Love broken down to Basics.

This article initially titled “Love Broken Down to Basics” was published on this blog before in 2016, in a longer form. The topic has been very close to my heart, and I am absolutely thrilled to see it take a new form to be published on India Currents, a South Asian digital media magazine with the largest following in the United States.

I will be very honored and humbled for you taking the time to visit this link to read it in full.
https://indiacurrents.com/straddling-two-cultures-conditioning-love/

It is my deepest joy to know your thoughts on my words about Love. Sincerely.

96 thoughts on ““Straddling Two Cultures, Conditioning Love” Published on India Currents”

  1. Beautiful post dear Pragalbha. ❤️ I love how you managed to explain love with a pot of love!! I Loved the creativity and your imagery saying it in a perfect way. 👌 Indeed love hurts but love yourself a lot more. Thanks for this lovely share. ❣️❣️

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    • Thank you so much dear kind friend. That pot of love was so real for me in my experience, I literally used to imagine and say it can hold or dissolve anything and everything – it was my greatest strength and weakness 🙂 It is so fulfilling to know you read and then reflect back on it .

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  4. “Also, there are people that I had held lovingly in my pot before, who won’t interact with me anymore. I am just not the same person to them anymore. That hurts. But then I have hurt others along the way too. I forgive myself. I love myself.”

    I love your entire narrative! It speaks so eloquently! I think this one paragraph encapsulates the idea!

    When we have no boundaries and don’t know how to love ourselves, we attract people who will happily take advantage of us but when we develop boundaries and grow to love ourselves, they become upset and accuse us of changing!

    “Yes! Why yes, I’ve changed!”, isn’t the response they like to hear, for underneath it all, we changed the rules on them and they would have to work hard to reduce our boundaries and our newfound self love into small pebbles to step over! Some might try to do just that, but we can step aside and let them pass, for they are no longer on the same path as we are!

    I love this story! So powerful and positive! Congratulations on your publication! 🥰🌸🌸🌸

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  6. Dearest Pragalabha,
    Your words are familiar and resonate deeply in my soul. I love the metaphor of pots.. the broken and the whole ones that charm my kitchen and each have a place in my heart like your words so beautifully expressed! Each are gifts like this piece you shared. As we crack, continue to grow in love of ourselves and others we cannot ignore our love and truth of our yearnings. Congratulations on the pub so well deserved my friend💖🌈💖

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    • ” if we don’t love ourselves unconditionally something will always feel incomplete.” – I love this clear statement you make, it has such deep relevance continually in our life. I am very grateful to have your similar understanding and thoughtful appreciation on my article.

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      • I would say that I have begun to understand this over the course of time. I was being too harsh on myself, trying to fit into the boxes of expectations that others make, rather that I assumed they make. It took a time to be free by looking inward and now I am able to grasp that loving myself is a mirror in its true sense. 🙂
        Thank you for sharing your wonderful posts to remind us at each step Pragalbha. 🙂

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    • I am very honored and humbled that you took the time dear Michele. I do not know how comments work on that platform yet, I will keep a check to see if yours appears. I am very happy to know you enjoyed my perspectives on Love, thank you very much, truly means a lot to me.

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  11. Again, there is so much to digest! What keeps going through my head about love everyone and do so unconditionally, is that part of actively loving is to not actively hate and being a loving human does not mean being a punching bag for others. I love your line “I learned to become strong in choosing what works for me and what does not”. Sometimes love means don’t be in that person’s life. Sometimes love means accepting someone doesn’t want/need you in their life.

    Again, SO much to digest here. Thank you for writing it 🙂

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  13. love is the strength that sustains us all… I love that and the opening in this post was profound…love is present even when we are not conscious of it… it exist… your heart and soul is much richer…Infinite you are love and you are loved…

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  15. A metaphorical and honest share of how important it is to take care of and love ourselves, first. I love reading that your journeys have led you to a jackpot of love. A gift for you and everyone in your circle. And for your readers too. 😊 I think it would be interesting to learn more about your blending of two cultures.

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    • Thank you for your kind attention and appreciation dear Michele, I am glad you enjoyed the metaphor and honesty. Yes it gives me smiles that you highlight this jackpot of love – it is a gift continually unfolding :)))
      I have to admit this – I was surprised to see the title when the articel first came out – as it had been changed without my knowledge by the editor from ‘Love Broken down to Basics” to “Straddling 2 Cultures…” I immerdiately felt like the article itself might not do justice to that title, as I have no idea yet how I would write about blending 2 cultures. This was more a personal narrative. I am still very happy and grateful for the publication. These experiences of publishing outside of my blog are new to me, and so I will know more going forward.

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      • You are most welcome, always. 🌻 Your original title seems more fitting for your personal narrative. Should you choose to explore and write about your two cultures, the piece(s) would be interesting. Bravo on sharing your writing beyond your blog! 👏🏻

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  16. Such a beautiful write, which sits deep in my heart. “At times made myself small enough to fit into their pots. Alas, all they noticed was how small I was.” My journey to authentic love of myself was similar. I held other people’s whole existence within me, yet didn’t love myself, thus loving others was impossible. Not until I woke up to the possibility of authentic beingness, filled with love from within for myself first, and then everyone else, could I truly understand how that Love manifests. In deep pain, and letting go of relationships of many, many, years, of speaking my truth always, even when, maybe especially when, it’s not a popular opinion, and, of course, in deep joy too. Living an authentic life, unbound and limitless, is not easy, yet it is an experience of true Aliveness. A beautiful experience. Thank you for sharing parts of your story with us, and for creating this space of love and light, Pragalbha. Always honored to be here. Congratulations on the publication!! 🙏💛

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    • I held other people’s whole existence – the enormity of this dawned on me repeatedly, nobody has ever said these exact words, I thought of these and didn’t think anyone would undersatnd what I mean. I have felt dumbstruck and dumb for how did I even manege to carry that much – and yet it was freedom to recognize that that is actually my strength that can be put to service with better skill and discernment. I feel the need to repaeat every sentence you say here – it is so exactly I relate to. It is funny not funny how difficult it is to stay free. Yet oh yes how precious is the Aliveness,the joy, the Love available – freely 🙂 Jeff, I am so truly deeply comforted, affirmed and empowered to have your thoughts to read here. Thank you ever so much Infinitely.

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      • “and yet it was freedom to recognize that that is actually my strength that can be put to service with better skill and discernment.” This is so true, and resonates so deeply. I didn’t even really know for the longest time that I was carrying so much, as that was just how I thought it all worked. Yet, once a more subtle discrement was available to me, I could see how toxic in fact carrying so much for other people was for the mind and body. Freedom indeed. I am so delighted to have you affirm for me this way of beingness, which was, for a long time, something I was carrying alone. I know that to not be the case today, and appreciate you very much for always sharing of yourself with us; it warms my heart, and creates a deep connectivity and deeper understanding. It is always my honor and pleasure to be here, Pragalbha. Thank you for always creating such a transformative space. 🙏💙

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        • “I didn’t even really know for the longest time that I was carrying so much, as that was just how I thought it all worked. ” yes, yes. So true. So good to feel the lightening of the load in this moment yet again, from being validated for this journey, for all the pain of extracting the life of other people from my being. This freedom has been continually renewed and refreshed, so good to be here, so grateful for this conversation _()_

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    • “Love has no boundaries when we set no expectations.” this is so perfectly said dear Astrid, something that took a while to learn. So many illusions we get trapped in, on the way indeed. Thank you very much for taking the time and adding your thoughtful comment.

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  27. I read your article, and I cried.! Our innocent world views life as children, and everyone is like us. And we are the same pot. But, we are not the same pot.

    Loved the article – the intro just gets you hooked. And it made me cry how much I resonate, thou my life has not followed the traditional path of most Indian women.
    I quote you “…I learned to become strong in choosing what works for me and what does not — to keep myself together because I love myself now. There were people that had taken space in my pot for a long time earlier, I chose to keep them at a distance from me now, and that hurts. Also, there are people that I had held lovingly in my pot before, who won’t interact with me anymore. I am just not the same person to them anymore. That hurts. But then I have hurt others along the way too. I forgive myself. I love myself.

    I have now hit this jackpot of love where I relate to people with the interest of authentic human connection. I crave genuine, uplifting, nurturing, nourishing, motivating, inspiring interactions. I want those that I love to choose better for themselves first. We practice loving ourselves best we can, helping each other earnestly on the way.

    Love hurts. Lack of it certainly does hurt a lot, so love yourself a lot more!”

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    • Dearest Bella, your words touch me deeply to the core, I sit here in silence receiving your loving acknowledgment, sending you love and hugs. Thank you for being my friend here, it is comforting to the naive little girl alternate persona in me who wants to insist on all love all the time, and confused over why it is not enough. I love reading what you quote back from me, it is empowering to the persona I am becoming and continue to strengthen. Much Gratitude & Love to you.

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      • I too have always believed in love, and that all are good, and why would anyone be different. It make life hard to live at times, because not all are here to love honestly, truthfully, with not limits. I wrote a post a hater will hate regardless, and then I was like this is so strong, they could change. They did for a bit, and revert back to the title. It is hard to become someone we don’t recognise, it hurt us deep inside. Thank you for your lovely post and it truly need to be read far and wide, for there are many who will cry and reasonate . And their hearts hurt will be lessened just by reading this beautifully written post of yours

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        • Yes I truly believed everyone eventually changes, wants to change, they are this way only because they are hurting – it was shocking revelation to me that this might not be so, sometimes people are trapped in their patterns just like I am trapped in mine often times. That I shouldn’t count on others changing and my well being cannot depend on that. Thank you so much for saying that my words are worthy of reaching far and wide, it is deeply fulfilling for me to receive this acknowledgment from you. I yearn to be heard on this one, and I feel deep joy and gratitude for your words. Thank you truly from all my heart.

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  28. Pingback: It’s about love for what it is – Vishal Bheeroo

  29. Just read it through and something that needs to sink inside. “Love hurts. Lack of it certainly does hurt a lot, so love yourself a lot more!” How true, the people who pretend they are part of us and sometimes we need to make a decision on who to keep in our lives. It is important Pragalbha and this piece pushes me to reflect a lot and will read it again.

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    • It is my utmost joy and gratitude Vishal to have your kind attention and time of reflection on this piece. Yes, it does become important to recognize and choose who really is part of our life and wellbeing, often not so easy. Thank you very much.

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  32. Pragalbha, you express so beautifully that I could see with my senses…that pot turning into the jackpot…while I was reading your magnificent writing about your transformation…you discovered love & you discovered YOU…from The Genie to The Being…the moment one seas oneself clearly…the whole scene changes instantly…even others can also see this on their screen…but this jackpot can’t be won or achieved by luck…one needs to walk on this path; this journey…”Love is felt deep and love is felt light. It is felt in its absence and in presence. It is present whether you are aware or unaware.”…my gratitude to you for your heartfelt sharing…the sharing filled with your wisdom 💫💟✨

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    • Dear Navin, you truly recognize that moment of self-discovery, the revelation, the journey that affords it. You see the process so clearly and that little girl with the pot of love feels seen for who she is, when you read this article and offer your own wise generous reflection of it. What a gift truly it is to have this deep understanding and appreciation from you. My Utmost Gratitude to you.

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      • It’s my pleasure & honour to read your writings…your experiences, your knowing, your wisdom…they bring joy & peace in me…so, it’s the other way around…thank you for your heartfelt sharings…a favour I would like to ask you this moment…would you share with me the link…whenever you publish your own book?…if you’ve already published one, then please do share with me…I’d love to read your lines…your book…this thought has just arrived, you must know…

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        • Your request for my book is very precious to me, trust me for how much I mean this, I have never felt this assured desire for actually having my book out in the world one day, the kind I feel today. Godwilling, when and how it is supposed to unfold – Dear Universe I ask this guidance Now. I am overjoyed with imagining you holding and reading my book. Thank you Navin for this ask, I take it as a divine message for me. For now this blog is all my published work, along with all the scatterings of unpublished poetry that haven’t showed me yet where they want to be.

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