What do I Really Want?

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Photo Credit : Manish Doshi, Editing : Vikram Phale

What do I want?
What do I really want?
Everything anyone would ever want
I seem to have it all

Looks like it all fell to my lap
Just I paid with my life for all that
At times allowed my heart to be taken out whole
Be shaped like whatever anyone wanted
Often put back half used and cold

What do I want?
What do I really want?
Everything anyone would ever want
I seem to have it all

Now is the time
To ask for exactly what I would want
Until now I wanted just what everyone would want
Now is the time
To explore exactly what I am here for

My heart feels safe
In the warmth of my rib cage
Embody gratitude for all that I am gifted
Just not willing to stop asking more
Finally feel worthy to the core

All roles well played
Each and everyone, their’s and mine
To help me realize
It is me and my heart
Forever together in this lifetime

All else just tremendous perfection
Of how we find other in intersection
Keep nurturing our hearts
Knowing deeply “We are One”
Through eternity & this life in all sorts

What do I want?
What do I really want?
Everything anyone would ever want
That is exactly what I want and more.

 

Yoga – My work & Life

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Emotional Orphan

Loneliness - Sunrise at Kala Pathar beach - Havelock - 1F8A1052

Loneliness by Atanu Chakraborty

Orphan
Emotional Orphan
Born intact with every organ

A roof over head
Food & family all provided
Yet never felt loved or if mattered
Never touched & hugged & assured
When bodily sick, definitely for-cared
With food & medicine & worry vexed

Born from the womb of the one
Whose heart severely lascerated
Parents two souls on a journey calliberated
Unaware they carry the precious seed
Of the radiant one born of them

Orphan
Emotional Orphan
Knows deeply the fountain of joy

Looks around at the gloom
Paints own fantasy of life abloom
Imagines miniscule castles, tales of adventures
On the floor tiles, as if living a grand dream

Life awash with gleeful eyes
The shine, the glow and laughter
Made kin & cousins wonder why such rejoice
As if something wrong that always the smiles
Misconstrued & confused tears flew miles

Conforming to belong and pleading
Tears flow as if heart open bleeding
Amazing grace & strength head held high
At times weeping cries that pierced the soul
Tribe mocking now looking wry
All this perfect life you have -and you still cry?

The vibrant outlook on life
Does it strip away the human need
To ever have someone just sob
To be comforted and held close to womb
To be assured, guided & emotions lightened?
The radiant one always chose strength
Now bleary gives up at length
Choice of strength refrained from all & any nurture
Own mind became a tormenting torture

Orphan
Emotional Orphan
Lost in relentless effort to create beauty
Through emotions & relations & dreams

Trying to earn the love in between screams
Taken for granted as blessed & blissed
Gratitude taken, it’s intention missed

Shelter & food & names called family
Burdens of keeping up heritage heavily
To get any love, earn it & yearn it seethingly
Deserve it & now demand it just for Being
Have given up heart & soul for the tribe
Not willing now to live life searing
As if pieced by the cutting knife

All misunderstood only for seeking love
Blamed for indifference & ingratitude
Guilt feeling for just breathing alive
As if unworthy of choosing or receiving any joy
Dripping dried tears of blood from the heart
Brick hard becomes the throbbing head
All this while trying to paint life beautiful red …

 

P.S. This post first appeared on This Glorious Mess on Medium

P.S 2 – This is a contribution to dear Debbie’s ForgivingFridays on ForgivingConnects Her blog is a beautiful space that facilitates forgiveness and peace for all distressed souls.

Redefine Love

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“Let True Love Break Through” Photo Credit: Niyati Shah, Editing: Vikram Phale

If it feels like a brick pressed on your heart
It is not love, it is a lie

If it feels like you are pressed for last drop of juice
It is not love, it is a lie

If you are being the jester entertainer
With no option ever of being a tad sadder
It is not love, it is a lie

If your inert silence is their boredom
It is not love, it is a lie

If you are making choices only for others’ happiness
With no regard for your own true joy
It is not love, it is a lie

If you are looked upon to fill every gap & hole
It is not love, it is a lie

If both your gratitude and contributions are taken for granted
It is not love, it is a lie

It is all a lie you told yourself
It is how you defined love to yourself
It is how you trained the other minds to feel loved
It is how they trained you to give or get love

Cast off gradually, all the wrong ways of love
Go through the storm of seemingly no love
Feel the pain of ripping off of so called love
Melt the brick at heart with Self love

Be kind to yourself and others involved
It is not always necessary relations be dissolved
Often takes every bit of resilience to have it resolved
Souls interacting unaware what is truly to be absolved

For each individual there be an unforced place
With in between a delicious space
Find joy for you that feels natural to you
Let the nectar of true Love drip in that space

Your choices allow a sense of liveliness
Intersect with one another radiating loveliness
Share your appreciation & apprehension
Not needing a wall for seperation

Find the feeling like never before defined
Immerse in love that feels unconditioned
Start over, only genuine regard expected
For every living soul, deep existence respected

 

P.S. This is a contribution to ForgivingFridays of dear Debbie’s blog Forgiving Connects

What are you really looking at?

I wish to reblog this post for 2 reasons:
1. Now it is updated with a gorgeous image to go with it.
2. I find myself revisiting this process of transformation, letting go and healing. May this season bring us all closer to the Light & Love.
I would love to know your thoughts on this.

Infinite Living

Peeping thru the leaves - starburst at dawn - Kala Pathar beach - Havelock - 1F8A1073 “Peeping through the leaves” by Atanu Chakraborty

There’s an empty glass of water sitting on the counter. It is broken. It is holding together but it has been shattered and has cracks going all direction. I look at it and see just that and nothing else …a piece of broken glass.

If you try to think of a situation or event in life that might have shattered your intact way of being …what do you really think of ? A situation that has cracked your core and wounded you open in places? Or something that has been bothering you very much since yesterday or last week? The broken glass probably doesn’t really represent anything to you. Life is perfect …except that this person, yesterday or last week, did not behave well, had a wrong attitude, did not do exactly like you expected or even deserved. My glass is as intact as…

View original post 560 more words

So close to home

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Photo Credit : Manish Doshi, Editing : Vikram Phale

So close to home
And as if trying to find my way
Just around the corner
And feeling as if lost on the way

Oh so puzzled
Mind all muddled
Oh usually that’s the way
It is, they say

It’s human, regular human
Easy to relate
Better than to create
And to reach home solemn

Relate to everyone around
Than create your path abound
Former may seem easy
Latter a thrill to foresee

So close to home
In there is it very lone?
Just around the corner
Seems fun to linger

There’s plenty of company
And also sometimes misery
Should I just go home
And see how it is to be lone?

All puzzled and muddled
I enter my home
To be cuddled
In my own heart and soul

Wish someone would accompany
There is a threshold though
Beyond which only I can go
It really doesn’t help to have anybody

Take the step, take the plunge and dive
Take your puzzles and the muddles
Rest them there and watch them live
Don’t solve the riddles
Don’t push nor let them cling really
Give them a place
And they will go away actually
Ah! this home is a peaceful space

Back out in the world
And around the corner again
Still trying to find my way
New found faith to help stay

The puzzles and the muddles
Don’t bother now
A light flickers every step of the way
Just follow the instinct I say

So close to home now I know
While always trying to find my way
I do often revisit home
Now that I also love to be lone …

I Certainly Will …

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Photo Credit : Vikram Phale “Honor The Light Within You”

I may not boost your ego
I will honor your soul

I may not respect authority for sake
I will honor you as human whole

I may not see age or gender
I will honor your authentic core

I may not bow to your demand
I will surrender to your regard or love

I may not beg or be belittled
I will seek your wisdom galore

 

P.S. Dear Debbie, I gladly contribute this post to Forgiving Fridays. May we together honor the essence of our being, and of those around us.

Of Journeys & Happiness

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Photo Credit : Pragalbha Doshi “Happy Birthday DH”

You love driving great distances
On roads with seemingly no ends
Taking me along, you in the driver’s seat
Record trips, some unthinkable adventures
That map across the states, thousands of miles
Sometimes no difference days or nights

Those travels just represent
The real journey together we transcend
You endeavor to create a splendidly simple life
You live though with challenging choices of your poetess wife 🙂
You are indeed a skilled driver to me
Giving me a ride on this rocky life road
All the way we traverse through eternity
On your special day, Happy Birthday dearly

 

P.S. Dedicated to my Dear Husband on his special day 🙂