The most memorable thing anyone said to me

Myself in the Tall Woods – Photo by Manish Doshi

During one of the weekend trainings that I was taking about 5 years ago, another girl who was about my height or an inch taller, came up to me and said

“At your height, you really teach us how to stand really really tall!”

I had a good laugh with her and responded “This (height) is all I ever got, so I just stand that’s all”

She then shared with me how my passionate contributions to discussions had helped her gain confidence in her ability to speak up for herself, ask questions in front of the group.

I don’t remember being bothered, but I have been reminded all my life of being short. Nobody did the reminder as amazingly for me as this kind classmate did!

I thought this was the most memorable thing that anyone said to me. Then few months ago, I was in a phone conversation with a long time friend, sharing our latest life experiences with each other lovingly. She suddenly said “You know Pragalbha –

You live as if someone getting a PhD on the subject of life itself… not just studying but actually living it”

I was speechless, also because I only have an idea of the amount of meticulous research and dedication required of those who pursue the PhD degree. I do not have the experience of it. My educated friend went on to remind me “Oh you are no different, always remember that. You have a similar passion and dedication towards life itself, and to my eyes you live exactly like any other PhD aspirant.”

I remember being bothered by my lack of higher education and degrees behind my name during my younger years. It used to cut into my sense of self worth. A lot of life happened before I grew out of that and found my purpose in life. I feel content and blessed for how I was guided all along to reach where I am. I was absolutely humbled with what my kind friend had to say about my approach to life.

Now I have 2 most memorable things anyone said to me that make me smile when I remember them :)))

I would love to know – What are the most memorable compliments given to you? What do you think of those I shared?

Earth Gratitude – 2

There are often days or weeks together that I don’t step out of my home. When I do, I am gifted with the most incredible sights around. The Universe is simply so generous, so forgiving of my inattention and so readily showering me with these luxurious moments. These following glimpses, all within a mere 10 minute evening walk, 2 weeks ago. I indulge in the feeling until I venture out next …

I ventured out
You dressed up

Sunset

I looked up
You blessed me

Moon Blessing

Earth
You a Miracle Wonder
Me
One ungrateful imposter

Colors on Earth

Earth
You as if exist for me
Me
Lived enough as if you don’t exist

Earth
What would you want from me
That is what I would like to be

Earth Gratitude – 1 (previous post)

The sadness, the joy …Grateful to be back!

Photo Credit : Vikram Phale

I have been looking for a doorway back into this space certainly. There was an inert kind of sadness when my inspiration to keep posting trickled to a stop, earlier this year. I trusted it to show me when and where to be. I woke up this morning with a design of the quote image above and a clear feeling of wanting to bring it here for my WordPress friends.

As the entire world went through tumultuous changes that came with the pandemic, I took time to appreciate simple blessings, the gifts of being alive, the deepening heart connections for how real the ephemeral nature of our existence is.

Glimpse of the Sky and the Earth seems a true indulgence – Photo by myself

Sadness is really one side of the coin, when a mere breeze from the air or a caring word from someone brings us joy.

Happiness heals the planet
the kind that makes you smile from the heart
…and from behind your closed eyes
the kind that is only truly felt
…if the joy is shared

Some corners of Earth draw me in, as if I am moving inward within – Photo by myself

I questioned myself a lot for what my purpose on this planet is, what is my role truly in all my relations, gave myself permission to practice being unapologetically myself and enjoyed the privileges afforded to me. I went through some major internal shifts but then who hasn’t lately?!!

As we all question what our role is
In this world when none can stay passive
Take care of yourself no guilt & then give

We are all together in how our heart lives this


I am so happy and grateful to be back here to connect with you all and further explore the emergence of inspiration and new avenues of being!

Humble gratitude to all of you who emailed me or left messages in this space to ask about my well-being and to let me know that I am missed. Means-a-lot-whole-lot-to-me. You have been the most kind witness of my inner world when it poured out and needed to be received.

As I make my way to find you and your words, one by one, I await your visit on my post with childlike curiosity for who would I engage with next as I perhaps see your comment 🙂

Be-Come

Be-Come

Picture, Editing and Quote by myself

There’s a message within me that I am holding on to.
There’s a purpose within me that I am holding on to. There’s an inner reality within me that seeks to pervade the outer world. There’s an outer reality that I am continually attempting to merge with from within.

I still see inner and outer realities separately.
So I know that I am not as mature yet to feel integrated consistently. It is a work in progress on a daily basis to access this integration through my yoga asana, conscious breath, meditation practice, study of the universal principles, time with trusted teachers & noble friends, choosing actions out of deep listening for clarity and intention.

I am often sloppy and imperfect in how I live this.
Any time I have attempted to do any work from a place of want, I have had to cut through the noise of how it should be done. It takes up a lot of energy to clear out the pressures and fears that come with goal oriented choices.

My greatest power to be of value to myself or anyone has been my innocence.
It is those things that I had no idea of What and Why I was doing it, that have given me the most beautiful, joyful, nourishing experiences and expressions of life. I seem to have accepted what was coming or given to me, then aligned and equipped myself to be the best contribution I can be. This holds true for everything from motherhood to blogging.

The illusion of knowing a lot more than ever now takes away my innocence.
It takes away my capacity to accept, explore and live playfully. It makes me take refuge in my comfort zone and resist change. I am now seeking to be more deeply anchored within –  from where I find the strength of a mountain and the child like innocence.

I affirm here to listen intently for where I am called and show up consciously.
I lay down to rest all that I think I know and want. I remain present for what needs to come up for the moment, the day, the person, the situation, the project, the intention. A structure arises for me to work with, from what looks like a chaos that overwhelms at times.

It is not about what I want. It is about what wants to Be and Come through me.

It is not about what I want. It is about what wants to Be and Come through me.

IMG_20191125_103231

Original picture from one of my morning walks, from which I made the quote image above

 

Focus

Focus

“Myself on the trail” Photo by Manish Doshi

I have lived with a confusion of what exactly I want to do with the rest of my lifetime.

I looked upon the path I was walking on, I often saw multiple trails coming up ahead. The best I could zoom in was to stand at a fork trying to decide which one of the two roads ahead I want to choose.

That led me to question myself : “What is my purpose?” “What is the work that I am truly given time for, on this planet?” “Which dream do I follow? Which dream is truly mine? Which ones are more ideas from others about what I could be/should be doing?”

It felt like this lifetime wouldn’t be enough to cover the paths becoming evident to me.

It is funny how clarity in different directions can create confusion!

The word ‘Focus’ dawned on me. I needed to focus in one direction for now, I told myself.

I followed my inclinations and found things that I couldn’t stop doing. They are enough to fill the day ahead & my heart with immense joy & peace. I am committed to those.

It has become clear to me that I needn’t beat up myself with one ambition to focus on.

I am travelling this beautiful road of life and I have a lot of glorious views on the way. I give myself permission to look side ways and take time to appreciate what I see.

This picture of mine taken unknown to me, gives me a glimpse of my Focus in life.

I kneel to the ground in reverence to how I am being guided and choose to look through the lens of a powerful perspective.

I still see the fork in the road ahead of me, not knowing which way each trail twists & turns. Yet, I am seeing that I will be led on to one of them, one day at a time.

Something tells me there is a possibility that both those trails could meet at a later time, and I might have the opportunity to have an integrated experience of fulfilling all my dreams on the way. Just maybe …

 

This post is a contribution to ForgivingFridays, a monthly initiative by Debbie Roth of Forgiving Connects, a blog of inspiration to me.

 

What do I Really Want?

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Photo Credit : Manish Doshi, Editing : Vikram Phale

What do I want?
What do I really want?
Everything anyone would ever want
I seem to have it all

Looks like it all fell to my lap
Just I paid with my life for all that
At times allowed my heart to be taken out whole
Be shaped like whatever anyone wanted
Often put back half used and cold

What do I want?
What do I really want?
Everything anyone would ever want
I seem to have it all

Now is the time
To ask for exactly what I would want
Until now I wanted just what everyone would want
Now is the time
To explore exactly what I am here for

My heart feels safe
In the warmth of my rib cage
Embody gratitude for all that I am gifted
Just not willing to stop asking more
Finally feel worthy to the core

All roles well played
Each and everyone, their’s and mine
To help me realize
It is me and my heart
Forever together in this lifetime

All else just tremendous perfection
Of how we find other in intersection
Keep nurturing our hearts
Knowing deeply “We are One”
Through eternity & this life in all sorts

What do I want?
What do I really want?
Everything anyone would ever want
That is exactly what I want and more.

 

Yoga – My work & Life

No I won’t …

YellowRose

Photo Credit : Vikram Phale

No
I won’t flaunt
But you see
I won’t any more
Hide

No
I won’t be proud
But you see
I won’t any more
Just stay on the side

No
I won’t lose any preciousness
Any more, in having to prove it
To every one and any one
I will just Be it

 

P.S. Originally published at This Glorious Mess on Medium.

Choose Differently

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Photo Credit : Niranjana Shah

Don’t choose the difficult

Only to prove you Can choose the difficult

Choose what is Right even if it is difficult

Often it is the Simplest that is the most difficult