Who’s breath am I breathing?
Who’s story am I weaving?
Who’s memory am I churning?
Who’s thoughts am I carrying?
With each breath I take
Who’s life am I living?
Who’s pain am I feeling?
Who’s right to breathe freely have I made my story?
Who is it that I am not left with my own pure breath for myself?
We talk about letting go. And for that process we invite all our stories and all of others’ woes to look at, to be able to let go. And then we look at them and we defend them and justify them and find ourselves lost in them. And the only thing we let go of is our deep, pure breath. Nothing else.
I have found that I imbibe, absorb, feel, sense every thought, feeling, energy around me. I pick up on it very sensitively. At times making my inner life a chaotic tangle of feelings. I have made a personal career out of my life to continually keep cleaning out my energetic closet that sometimes catches the cobwebs of negativity, lies, untruthfulness, facades, envy, jealousy in thought and action directed or not towards me. Most times I am not even aware of any of this actually going on. I just feel horrible inside and I know I am not breathing my pure breath but breathing a heavy air of all that is toxic to me. My breath catches it like a virus. I just feel it.
I have found myself very strong, resilient, having magical perspectives that lift me above any drama and trauma, in the face of the worst. I am unshaken in faith when it comes to threats to the well being of those closest to me and those who choose to work with me. I am undaunted in my intention of creation of a life of possibility and true joy for all of us. I will not give up on my version of a world where we absolutely trust the spoken word, show up as our real self and have compassion for each other.
Yet I end up using tremendous energy to keep my head above the waters of feelings and emotions of those around me physically, virtually and spiritually. I am an empath who feels the hurt behind your need to lie to me, your need to be untruthful to me, to act what you don’t mean with me. Yes I actually feel it and live it until I process it to rise above it.
I know I have done this when I am able to breathe purely, deeply, fluidly, smoothly, softly, leisurely, luxuriously – just pure breath of air that does not carry any charge, thought, feeling, emotion, story attached to it. I am glad it is becoming increasingly easier, and the beauty of life is pouring in for me.
Do you know what a gift this kind of breath is? Have you given yourself a breath solely for yourself lately? Have you lived a moment purely as yourself lately?
I have dedicated my life to just that – taking as many deeply pure breaths and teaching you to do the same. It is a learning process to be able to let go of the stories. Even the real ones have to be let go, so they actually change.
Let’s breathe space into our stories instead of our stories clinging to our breath.
This post is a contribution to ForgivingFridays on ForgivingConnect, an amazing blog by Debbie Roth.
I am told …
My Realness is Intimidating
That they don’t know what to do with me
I don’t know what to do with that …
It is Not a Necessity
To Be Understood
Such Freedom to Understand this
All that you envy, it is very possible to achieve
All that you can Be, is impossible for others to perceive
Simple reason to keep Being what you truly can Be
And that is how you might become the one envied
But then you become oblivious to the very concept of Envy
P.S. I think you will like another short one about Envy – Here, Take them All, if you haven’t already read it 🙂
This post is a contribution to ForgivingFridays of ForgivingConnects. Debbie Roth’s work here facilitates how we can truly Be with forgiveness and compassion.
You Talk Too Much
This is what they said to me
I didn’t know what to do about it
Until I realized after long
I was expressing wrongly
In all places wrong
I became a writer
Expressing from my heart exactly
You Don’t Talk To Me Much Now
This is what they say to me now
The numbness that we wear, in order to always smile
Choosing not to feel the pain, with that practiced smile
It is liberating to experience all there is, and not smile
For the true joys of life do not necessitate that we smile
One that comes from the heart and eyes is a true smile
P.S. This is a contribution to ForgivingFridays on ForgivingConnects, a blog by dear Debbie Roth, that is a wonderful work in support of acceptance, self-forgiveness, and self- love.