The frustration of feeling dedicated fully in all relations
This post is an example of the conversations I send out to those who kindly joined me here: YogaSaar
One of the humbling privileges of working privately with individuals is the precious conversations we have:
”I go to work – manage and deliver to subordinates and bosses quite efficiently. I come back home and as a parent, I feel completely out of control, snapping at my kids – their optimism & humor feels a burden to me – all I see is their naivety, they don’t understand life as much! My parents live with me, I can’t make them unhappy at this age so I try to choose what they approve of. I am also managing my spouse’s relationship with my parents. It keeps going – I try to figure how to feel balanced even at home, not to react as much, and yet it just happens”
Reflections I offered during our session:
Yoga is a game of identities – are we aware of where we are operating from? Awareness brings heightened sensitivity. Do we allow the space to understand and deal with that? How can I sincerely have any amount of ease in all my roles? Where am I over-delivering and over-compensating – in my dedication to serve all my identities? Can I allow my kids to have their own journey and be with them in that?
Next time you feel overwhelmed say :”Thank you Mind, for showing me the complexities of all my roles through the overwhelming feelings I have. I got this from here – I need some space, now that I have heard all that you are saying, so you can rest now!
I pull back all energy from where it was excess and shine light in spaces where I wish to be more present, with slowness and ease. I reconnect and recalibrate in all my roles with more presence and awareness and space to Be with. I take the time, even if it makes my mind uncomfortable. I am willing to Do less.”
YogaSutra 2.3 – The root cause of all our suffering are 5 kleshas:
1. Avidya – is like a veil over our eyes, it is our projection of past impressions, so we see things as other than what they really are.
2. Asmita – is the identity we operate with. Here lies the frustration with different identities intersecting – work, daughter, mother, wife – Who am I really? Buying into the idea that I am actually one of those is a klesha.
3. Raga – attachment to a comfortable/preferred outcome, what I would like to happen (in each of the identities above)
4. Dvesha – aversion or trying to avoid something from happening, what I dislike.
Abhinivesha – fear of the outcome
Any time we operate from one of the above we struggle, we suffer. Right action has an underlying peace to it, even if the choice is difficult to act on.
If you would enjoy my writings through the lens of yoga I will be thrilled to have you in conversation. I write regularly but inconsistently. Please add your name here: YogaSaar
If you have never worked with me before, I offer a 3 session orientation package of private yoga therapy at 15plus% discount to discover if you want to continue. Online available and has been effective. Write to me if you want more information, sign up only if it supports you. Free virtual seminar with follow up 8 week series (included) on Woman's Health & Well Being through all stages of life on Saturday March 25, register here: Emabrace Equity
Until next time, may you be gentle in your being and sparkling from your soul.
Much Love & Gratitude,
Pragalbha Doshi E-RYT500