A true Relation

Photo: Arnav Doshi, our son captured this photo of us 🙂

“Waves on the Sands of Time”

The richness of togetherness
Often is in the casualness
And the assuredness
In the seperateness

There is not much of day-to-day missing
More of the genuine caring and sharing
Relation sometimes easily taken granted
But never in the least slanted
Utmost trust and respect
Not a you-versus-me prospect

The differences are the strength
Work em out or let them be
The samenesses are the faith
On which you operate as WE

There is no as such fairy tale
There’s some laughs and some wail
It’s just how you help fly and sail
Look at the other soar with pride
While keeping pride itself aside

Each is a person evolving sole
Infinite being exclusively
It takes the finest of soul
To watch you on your own be whole
Yet be a partner unconditionally

Do I need an occasion or apprehension
To celebrate this true relation?
The heart spoke to me auspicious today
With such feeling and emotion …

 

Recently my husband & I celebrated our 20th Anniversary, 20 years of creating waves on the sands of time 🙂 The above poem, originally published on Aug 30, 2016, was a raw feeling then and now feels truer than ever. It only felt natural to share it again now, and also it was read by fewer WP friends back then.

 

Related posts on True Relations –
To the Perfect Spouse – 20 words only

Is there a perfect spouse? – short prose

A good marriage is the best – short poem

Relationships – A choice or a privilege – prose

P S : This post is an humble contribution to ForgivingFridays on Forgiving Connect, a blog by Debbie Roth, a beautiful one that you will find.

A Good marriage is the Best

Picture: Self  ‘A perfect fit?’ Editing: Vikram Phale

A happy marriage does not simply exist
The choices of happiness in it does

A perfect marriage does not just exist
The courage and kindness in one does

A marriage with all agreement does not exist
The growing up in disagreements does

A forever romantic marriage does not exist
The willing creation of undefined love does

A successful marriage does not already exist
The commitment towards success in it does

 

Some of my in-depth views and articles on this topic below!

Is there a Perfect Spouse?

Don’t Blow up your Life!

Truthful Commitments

Relationships …a choice or a privilege!

Don’t Blow Up your Life

Photo Credit: Manish Doshi “New Day begins on Kauai”

In the recent days I have had probably one less than someteen conversations regarding relationships while being true to yourself.

There comes a time in the path of personal transformation when you question every single one of your choices that you seemed to comfortably live with until now.

My simple message is don’t blow up your life and relations entirely in your minds. Stay steadfast in making choices that work for you. Take responsibility for those choices. Give others involved, space to catch up with your new choices. Do it with love for yourself and gratitude for anything that relation has given you until now. This is Yoga of Relationships. With yourself and others. It is a skill developed to continually attain a state of balance, in our day to day life and interactions.

“Don’t Blow Up your Life!” – Chase Bossart, Yoga Therapist

This is important for long time committed relations. Your new found realizations of right or wrong about the relation are yours to resolve. Unless you are choosing to walk out of the relation, your reasons to stay are part of your gratitude and not your limitation in life. If you are receiving something, anything from the relation, then be willing to contribute to the relation. The contribution would be, you going for the change you seek while allowing space for others to be themselves. Keep asking for the truth in your relationship while you keep going for your own truth. Give up the blame, shame, game and the fight.

Go for your own joy while giving others the space to be shaken a bit, or a lot. Hold them in the space of Love. When possible hold them a bit tighter in love. You can do this in your mind, if you don’t actually hug.

This becomes easy only when you are being courageous to choose your own joy and wellness. You don’t need to turn it into a you versus me battle. Carve out small ways of being yourself. Shop for yourself, open your hair, put on make up, cut back on make up, take powerful life decisions to bring change, do what it takes – small and big. Show up beaming with joy, or choose contentment, just for making a different choice.

Begin to imagine how you would like things to be. Then inch by inch, even millimeter by millimeter, start making different choices. If you are confident of making a mile of a change, go ahead do it!

Have kindness for all involved, including yourself. Do things differently than habitual, be bold, convey your truth. Give it time. Keep steady in choosing what makes you happy. Hatred in your heart will not make you happy. Forgive in the name of human limitation. It is a choice for your own peace. Break your own limitation on this. Love is not dramatic or romantic sometimes. It is way bigger. It is something that helps accepting what Is, wholly, and then changing it!

 

Yoga – My Work & Life

P.S. This post is a contribution to ForgivingFridays of ForgivingConnects, a wonderful blog by dear Debbie Roth.

Of Journeys & Happiness

Photo Credit : Pragalbha Doshi “Happy Birthday DH”

You love driving great distances
On roads with seemingly no ends
Taking me along, you in the driver’s seat
Record trips, some unthinkable adventures
That map across the states, thousands of miles
Sometimes no difference days or nights

Those travels just represent
The real journey together we transcend
You endeavor to create a splendidly simple life
You live though with challenging choices of your poetess wife 🙂
You are indeed a skilled driver to me
Giving me a ride on this rocky life road
All the way we traverse through eternity
On your special day, Happy Birthday dearly

 

P.S. Dedicated to my Dear Husband on his special day 🙂

Sometimes …

Photo Credit : Vikram Phale

When feelings are mutual
The efforts are equal
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
………….to stay apart …

Silent Communication

Photo : Pragalbha Doshi, Editing : Vikram Phale

We know there is so much to say to each other
Yet at times we don’t, a word utter

We came here with a soul contract
What makes us then at times retract

There are puzzling times trying to decide
Whether to say it or let it slide

There are other times of peace
When past spoken words bring ease

There is a feeling of contentment
After what feels like communication silent

There is relief in the assumption
The other knows exactly in intention

All that was left unsaid
So much that was often withheld

There is sometimes this entire conversation
In that which is silent communication

Is there a Perfect Spouse?

Is there a perfect spouse?

This question came up with my previous post that conveys a one-line sentiment To a Perfect Spouse.

No human is perfect. It is the perfection in relation to each other that matters. It is the freedom to be true to your being while having a tremendous commitment through all the messiness of human imperfectness. It is the dedication to evolving as a person with freedom, while nurturing the same freedom for the other. It is the care and love for the other, while standing steady on your own ground. And taking turns doing just that.

It is like having only one set of Teeth that you take turns to use, to chew on something called Life to you. LOL

It is bringing some fun and lightness while you do so for a life time. Sometimes even fun takes effort. It is honoring exactly what aspects of commitment are important to the other. And making it sacred, not sharing those aspects with anyone, in the name of free spirit or Infinite Living 🙂

A perfect relation does not limit either one from having other wholesome relations of any name and gender, because of the tremendous trust, commitment and vulnerability they share. They know it is unshaken for this lifetime. There is trials and treacherous tests of life on such relationships. The perfection is in the survival, sustenance and strength of character shown in such relationships.

No one is born a perfect spouse. It is what they give to the other, is what makes them perfect. Sometimes we tend to think of ourselves as the perfect one of the two. Sometimes we believe the perfect spouse doesn’t exist …only for us. Because the demand is only on the other person to be perfect.

Perfection comes from the love, care and also tenacity in the relationship. If you find it lacking some in your spouse …there are some points of evolution that exist for the both of you. That’s where your commitment gets used to step up and take the lead in nurturing the relationship into how you want it to be. It may not be a quick process but very much worth it. It also requires courage and conviction in yourself.

I am not taking into consideration here, any extreme cases of struggling, deceitful or abusive relationships. At the same time, I feel all sustained and truthful relationships undergo struggle. Because we are Infinite Beings, not bound beings. We have an innate rebel against any bondage. Heck we even rebel against our abilities/inabilities of our bodies! As if we are stuck in our bodies with all it’s pains.

Infinite freedom is available to us within the boundaries of our relationships for change and choice, within the relationship and outside of that relationship. There are no rules and bondages except created or accepted by us. The only important rule is your definition of your commitment. Keeping that, how many self- barriers are you willing to break? How willing are you to support your spouse do the same? Will you take the lead? Will you acknowledge the process if your spouse takes the lead?

 

P.S. If you feel inclined here are few of my other posts on relationships from different times. I appreciate all thought processes shared on my posts. All exchanges of perspectives are a growth for all.

Posts of one line or few

Couples

Love is when

Poetry

A true relation

Prose

Relationships …a choice or a privilege!

Relationship illusions and Truth of Soul

 

To the Perfect Spouse

You OWN me in this lifetime

Because of how infinitely UNOWNED

I feel and live

While in relationship with you

 

 

P.S. Dear WP friends, thank you for the thoughtful and warm messages waiting for me, as I return from my break 🙂 I took a break to attend to some things that were gaining momentum in my other worlds. The break although served another purpose. I became unwell, affording me rich times of grounding, growing and nourishing my Being, with everything that my Being craved for. As I recover and get back, I feel a clarity of my intentions. I am very eager to explore all the work I missed from all of you 🙂

P.S. 2 – Kindly do share with me what thoughts came up for you, about my sentiment to the Perfect Spouse, in agreement or otherwise 🙂

 

Couples

Sometimes the ability to be different
Is not an indicator of separation
It’s just the opposite.

Sometimes the ability to stay apart
Is not an indicator of a problem
It’s just the opposite.

A true Relation

The richness of togetherness
Often is in the casualness
And the assuredness
In the seperateness

There is not much of day-to-day missing
More of the genuine caring and sharing
Relation sometimes easily taken granted
But never in the least slanted
Utmost trust and respect
Not a you-versus-me prospect

The differences are the strength
Work em out or let them be
The samenesses are the faith
On which you operate as WE

There is no as such fairy tale
There’s some laughs and some wail
It’s just how you help fly and sail
Look at the other soar with pride
While keeping pride itself aside

Each is a person evolving sole
Infinite being exclusively
It takes the finest of soul
To watch you on your own be whole
Yet be a partner unconditionally

Do I need an occasion or apprehension
To celebrate this true relation?
The heart spoke to me auspicious today
With such feeling and emotion …