Of Truthfulness

Sail Sunset

Photo Credit: Manish Doshi

It is courageous vulnerability
Not a weakness
It is soul confidence
Not an arrogance
It is pure truthfulness
Not a lack of humility
It is heartfelt gratitude
Not a sign of neediness

It is actually an humble attempt
To persist in this made up world
With absolute will and trust
To insist on a world made of Love

Agnized their’s is a lonesome way
Greatest battles fought only within
Rain flowing from the eyes of turmoil
Emotional storms cleansing the heart soil

This is true of the ones who have tasted
The brutality of the life of humanness
The ambrosial essence of existence itself
Their tenacity time & again tested

A strength seemingly divine revealed
Ceded to the oceanic universal current
Soul-calling of intention keeps the ship asail
In the guided direction that Source avails

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Writing – a Journey of my Life

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Photo Credit : Manish Doshi

I have returned from my break absolutely inspired and pregnant with messages from the ocean and the sky. I am very eager to share them with you all, yet I am feeling uninspired to go through the process of making it into a post immediately. As if I want to steep in the experience a bit more and have the juices of the interaction with the ocean flow through my veins as if all mine. The message to become part of my Being. I can’t wait to get past this stage, pick it up from where I left off in my last post, before this deliciousness set in. I am giving myself permission to indulge in this space for a bit more.

I do want to have this following conversation with You.

How I became a writer is sort of an astonishing accident to me. I remember where I was and exactly the moment some words came to me and I was ‘forced’ to have those words typed. What came as completed looked like a poem to me. I was thrilled and absolutely scared at the same time. And more came and one more came. I was terrified. I sent them one by one to trusted friends, asked them if the words meant anything to them. I was so accustomed to living the surface level life (read turmoil) that this expression from the depth of my being felt alien to me.

It took me tremendous courage to begin sharing them publicly, as if baring my soul naked to be judged or accepted. I needed the kind approval from a trusted friend and sometimes my husband to hold my hand while I hit publish with the other. My heart raced a thousand miles an hour before the first like, the first kind comment came in, as a seal of approval for my eligibility to continue being whatever I was in this world of existence.

After each poem I often thought surely it was the last one, and looking around I always wondered where is this coming from? I just became insanely uncomfortable at times as if choking on words or tears and then it just became necessary to type all that needed to come. Often I typed words I did not know, looked up its meaning to find out it meant exactly what I needed it to mean and rhyme in the poem. Sometimes I made up words not in the dictionary, and they conveyed the right meaning. As some generous reflections and appreciation came as responses, I was utterly grateful as I was sure every time it was my last poem. The authentic exchange of perspectives and heartfelt interactions helped me thrive, grow, flourish and nourish my being.  In less than 6 months on WordPress I was amazed beyond measure at how a genuine word, true expression and pure intent becomes evident through words alone.

It got unstoppable. The poems, the prose, all came as these intense surges just wanting a place to land. I made a commitment to keep reading other writers because of what gift it was when they read me. Each one putting their attention and time on my work had my deepest gratitude that I earnestly conveyed through truthful response to their comments. I was able to post way less than I was writing personally. Drafts and drafts of different inspirations and topics that begged to be expressed have piled up to be published in some form or the other.

For almost 3 years now I have published 2 or 3 times a week, except about 3 breaks of a week to 3 weeks. Every single day reading other writers on different platforms and interacting through comments. The numeric growth of my blog followers and readers has been very slow compared to some others but my personal growth has been enormously satisfactory.

Until some months ago, I did not have mind space for adding pictures to my posts.  Slowly it started dawning on me that there were pictures taken by my photographer friends and those by my husband that spoke the words I wrote. None are ever clicked with a plan to go with my post. It is meditative and miraculous to me in how perfectly they choose to come together.

The emotional intensity from which my poems came have found a balance, my personality has changed quite a bit. I opened up to new strengths in my being. I have owned myself as a writer by now. I am going through a huge personal shift. I still have countless drafts and some unpublished poems and ideas for creating quote images. I feel immersed in this space of inspiration where I am soaking in some new energies and do not seem to have the mind space, energy and time to publish all that I know is waiting to be published. If you recognize this and have any advice for me, I am all ears. And if my sharing has helped you in any way then it is my privilege to be a channel that serves a purpose.

None of this was possible for me without You my friend. You know what you have done for me by being here for me and reading my words and responding. My utmost gratitude for that and our continued interactions and conversations.

 

Related posts :
Just how did the writer in me get born? – I realized that this poem had come through me exactly an year ago and today I have felt this strong urge to post on similar topic.
Top writer in Inspiration – prose

Envy & Inspiration

Reach out - Pristine Radhanagar Beach - Havelock - 1F8A1101

Photograph: Atanu Chakraborty “Reach out Into what Calls You”

I have been aware of the energy of envy since a very young age. In today’s times of social media, it has become all the more palpable. I think envy is simply the face of I-WANT-THAT. And I see nothing inherently wrong in it. I actually love to meet people that I start to feel a tinge of envy about. I like to actually share with them that I envy them for some particular aspect. By the time I know enough about them, I always find some genuine inspiration and there is no place for the green.

As a little girl, it was confusing for me to have the sense of self-worth mixed with the proportion of affluence. At some level, things seemed pretty simple to me …you have some things, and I don’t! But as the feeling of lack started creeping in, I slowly learnt to imbibe the energy of people around me who took pleasure in owning things, which I thought I would love to have too!

I learned to desire and trust that I will have all that I want and need.

Envy can hit us on all aspects of life like affluence, education, career, beauty, confidence. There is far more freedom in truly enjoying someone else’s happiness. If we look closely, each person’s asset could be their only true support system through this lifetime. People who seem to have it all very easily, are the ones who might have done the toughest groundwork to build their castle on. It can become very clear to us that we definitely do not want to be in anyone’s shoes. It can get really overwhelming to have to live all of the lives that we choose to envy. I now simply love the energy of the person who is truly enjoying something, be it money, faith, art, or love itself.

We open ourselves up for possibilities when we first enjoy the energies! We don’t have to have it all or live it all right now! And the freedom is even more when we realize that we truly didn’t need something we thought we did.

Someone said to me, “I envy a content smile, and wonder if it’s real or fake …” I say substitute the word envy with desire, I have now discovered that the content smile is the most important to want. There comes a time when all of us get tired of putting on smiles or wearing happiness on our faces. It is amazing when we can turn envy into inspiration! Simply go I want that content smile on me! Then look for what stops you from having it.

Envy just doesn’t feel good in the body, none of us enjoy not feeling good. Inspiration on the other hand feels amazing like the pulse of life itself. Don’t let anything touch you more than it serves you. You just need the energy of the person who has that smile, not that person’s life situation. You have your own life and magic to create for yourself. Trust your intention of love and service, and let go of all that won’t let you smile. Open yourself to new experiences, even if in the smallest possible way. Create space for that smile for yourself.

Regarding social media, some of us are not sharing the journey that brought us this kind of satisfaction, simply because bringing up that journey does not serve us more than sharing this smile. So use every smile to discover what’s really true for you. Smile …and always from the heart, look for it deeper when it doesn’t come from there. Every other aspect of life tends to follow a good genuine smile 🙂 Turn the green of envy into the red hot of desire to create for yourself …anything you want, really!!!


Originally published on December 2015

Recent short posts of few lines on envy: Envy & What can Be      Here, Take them All

Don’t Blow Up your Life

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Photo Credit: Manish Doshi “New Day begins on Kauai”

In the recent days I have had probably one less than someteen conversations regarding relationships while being true to yourself.

There comes a time in the path of personal transformation when you question every single one of your choices that you seemed to comfortably live with until now.

My simple message is don’t blow up your life and relations entirely in your minds. Stay steadfast in making choices that work for you. Take responsibility for those choices. Give others involved, space to catch up with your new choices. Do it with love for yourself and gratitude for anything that relation has given you until now. This is Yoga of Relationships. With yourself and others. It is a skill developed to continually attain a state of balance, in our day to day life and interactions.

“Don’t Blow Up your Life!” – Chase Bossart, Yoga Therapist

This is important for long time committed relations. Your new found realizations of right or wrong about the relation are yours to resolve. Unless you are choosing to walk out of the relation, your reasons to stay are part of your gratitude and not your limitation in life. If you are receiving something, anything from the relation, then be willing to contribute to the relation. The contribution would be, you going for the change you seek while allowing space for others to be themselves. Keep asking for the truth in your relationship while you keep going for your own truth. Give up the blame, shame, game and the fight.

Go for your own joy while giving others the space to be shaken a bit, or a lot. Hold them in the space of Love. When possible hold them a bit tighter in love. You can do this in your mind, if you don’t actually hug.

This becomes easy only when you are being courageous to choose your own joy and wellness. You don’t need to turn it into a you versus me battle. Carve out small ways of being yourself. Shop for yourself, open your hair, put on make up, cut back on make up, take powerful life decisions to bring change, do what it takes – small and big. Show up beaming with joy, or choose contentment, just for making a different choice.

Begin to imagine how you would like things to be. Then inch by inch, even millimeter by millimeter, start making different choices. If you are confident of making a mile of a change, go ahead do it!

Have kindness for all involved, including yourself. Do things differently than habitual, be bold, convey your truth. Give it time. Keep steady in choosing what makes you happy. Hatred in your heart will not make you happy. Forgive in the name of human limitation. It is a choice for your own peace. Break your own limitation on this. Love is not dramatic or romantic sometimes. It is way bigger. It is something that helps accepting what Is, wholly, and then changing it!

 

Yoga – My Work & Life

P.S. This post is a contribution to ForgivingFridays of ForgivingConnects, a wonderful blog by dear Debbie Roth.

There is a Difference

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LiveLifeGrand&Deep

There is a difference.
In living to make it look like
To be seen a certain way
To be remembered a certain way
To be talked about a certain way

And

Actually living the life exactly
As what would be seen and talked about
Only because that is the only way
That is skilled and known to live.
There is a difference.

The difference is
Vexed exhaustion
And
Calm conviction.

The difference is
Unknown inner suffering
And
Chosen wise suffering

The difference is
Mind maddening rush & fall
And
Heart exalting ebb & flow

No I won’t …

YellowRose

Photo Credit : Vikram Phale

No
I won’t flaunt
But you see
I won’t any more
Hide

No
I won’t be proud
But you see
I won’t any more
Just stay on the side

No
I won’t lose any preciousness
Any more, in having to prove it
To every one and any one
I will just Be it

 

P.S. Originally published at This Glorious Mess on Medium.

Yes I am foolish that way

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Yes I am foolish that way
I won’t sacrifice my simple joys every day
In an attempt of a future image to portray
I have none in my mind anyway

Yes I am foolish that way
My views can be most impracticable
I often go through the day sans any label

Yes I am foolish that way
When sometimes I get anxious or frustrated
Fact that we die any way has me comforted

Yes I am foolish that way
If you stand with me in competition
I will first give away what you need in compassion

Yes I am foolish that way
I value my every day true joy
Over something that is a futurely toy