2020 is a long year.
And yet it is already mid-November 2020.
My 15 year old said to me the other day “I can’t imagine living to 80 or 90 year old. That is just too much. I feel like I am on this Earth for too long already. I think it is tiring to keep living that long” He had said the exact same thing when he was 13 too.
I was speechless as to how to respond both times and a bit saddened that he thinks so. It took us few more conversations to arrive at the conclusion that the more we live to deliver to the expectations of social constructs, more tedious it seems to keep living.
I explained to him that I actually feel very young and I am forever learning something, growing, waiting to begin my life as if, and find that this lifetime wouldn’t be enough for what I think is possible. He explained to me that he doesn’t have time to think all that after attending school for 6 hours and working at assignments for another 5 or more hours. Then all we did was nod and smile at each other for what we had realized for ourselves.
The days are very long for my son who is in high school. The days can seem very short for me as I juggle my time between family chores and my personal pursuits. It can easily become overwhelming if I try to figure out what I should be doing. Most answers come from definitions of success and other conditioning. I have come to value Being – being at peace and joy and ease through anything that I am doing. This in itself becomes difficult at times as it involves setting boundaries and clearing attachment to certain ways of being.
It is a continuous process of discovery “What do I really want to do today?” that seems in alignment with me being my authentic self, in this moment and situation. Because life is very short really, to spend it any other way.
Dear friends and readers, I have made a friendly commitment to myself to post here every Monday. So I showed up today and simply decided to share what was lingering within and accessible to be expressed in words. I am absolutely thrilled to see if you have any thoughts to share with me on what became this post 🙂
P.S :
Related post : Be-Come
Another conversation with my son when he was 11 : An attempt at success?
Really beautiful words. I’m glad you and your son were able to talk about it.
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Thank you very much. I find it such a blessing when these conversations happen 🙂
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Blessings.🙂
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I ask the question: what does God (Jesus, Holy Spirit) want me to do with today. When I think I’ve understood I try to do that as well as I can. I don’t know whether that will help your son or not, but it has helped me.
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That is a very helpful and important perspective you share Frank. I feel like I have just recently found that kind of relation with God/inner Higher guidance. Hopefully I succeed in relaying it to him through my way of Being. The intermediate journey has been to find myself sorting through being lost in expectations and conditioning. I agree with you, the only responsibility is to do it as best as I can, once I listen carefully. Thank you very much for this valuable contribution.
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Nice to connect with you Pragalbha 🙂 Lovely post! I have two high schoolers and completely resonate with every word in the post! Reason I started blogging as well… to show them the abundance of what life has to offer!
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So grateful to connect with you too!! I am so glad that you join me in this quest to keep the spark of this life alive for our precious ones as much as for ourselves 🙂 Thank you for kindly visiting.
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length of life can seem long or short depending on your current situation as you both learnt from each other. When it is things we ‘choose’ to do to make our life more meaningful then time flies. But if it’s performing to fulfil societal expectations – do well at studies – then its a chore and time is slow.
If he can change his attitude to study or see some light at the end of the tunnel it will help.
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Yes you are right, it is in fact him who realized what you are saying – that time does fly when he is enjoying doing something 🙂 I felt very grateful to have had this honest conversation with him. While he is at this demanding stage in his student career I am optimistic that our conversations and his curiosity will guide him to figure out his ways as he keeps going. It double edged training to stay dedicated and yet look for freedom in choices 🙂
Thank you so much for your kind attention.
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as he is so openly conversing with you, you have a good strong relationship and that will get him thru his challenges .. he’ll be ok whatever comes his way 🙂
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Yes I am trusting that too. It is so precious and beautiful to have this opportunity to watch him grow into a more expanded version of his worldview 🙂 Thank you for affirming the same.
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he’ll do fine!
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Yes, thank you 🙂
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This is a very thoughtful morning read…very calming and soothing amidst all the negatity in the news and around..that simple conversations we have with our loved ones is really vital and valuable…thanks for sharing
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I find it a blessing when such conversations become possible, very precious when these young minds are willing to trust and open up. Thank you very much for your kind appreciation.
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I agree😊😊😊
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Loved it, worth a read.. Thanks for all the awesome stuff you share.. Yes, if we want to we can hear Him, as He’s waiting for us to ask for his guidance, through His voice, which can never be heard, but felt.. Inexplicable the feelings are, when we get His answers silently.. Beautiful..!!!! 🙏🏼😍
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Thank you very much for your kind appreciation and also bringing this powerful reminder – this voice of Divine Guidance is felt more than heard in silence and has never failed me from showing the miracles and possibilities. It is very significant that we pray and pay attention to what choices we are making for the day.
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Absolutely..!! 👍🏼😇🙏🏼💕
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The high school world is so small. Unfortunately, they don’t know it. Besides, they think the rest of the world is just like theirs. Once they get it, their world will expand, and then (hopefully) life starts to click. On a related note – a personal -ism. Whenever people ask me if I would like to be whatever age, I always respond with the same answer …. and be that stupid again? No thanks.
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I agree about how a world looks to him. It is beautiful to watch him grow 🙂
I relate to what you say about age – I never want to go back to any past time, as what I know now is simply amazing and what I don’t know yet is pure magic. The number assigned to the age feels irrelevant to me, as how I feel within is often nothing related to what my age looks like, and I sincerely hope and wish to acquire more innocence and wonder with any personal growth happening for me.
Thank you very much for your thoughtful response, truly.
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Perceptions of time and how difficult life is changes and fluctuates with each phase we go through. Your teen is very fortunate to have your guidance and input in life! Blessings to you both!! 🌸🌸
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Thank you so much for your affirmation and confidence to me. I receive your loving blessings for the both of us, with gratitude and love.
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🥰🌸🥰🌸🥰
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I’m fascinated by your interaction with your son. I feel as though I can relate to you both, depending on the day or time when I check in with myself. Life can feel too short, and then based on satisfying social constructs, far too long. So I agree it’s best, if possible, to live as authentically as possible. We are constantly learning and sometimes it takes getting older to realize how young we are.
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sometimes it takes getting older to realize how young we are – this is so perfect and I absolutely agree with what you say. In my mind I have often found a child like wonder return to me that is not considered very adult *laughing* but really life is so amazing and waiting to be discovered if we stay authentic. Thank you so much for sharing your thought, such happiness to me. I am reminded of Dain Heer as I am talking to you about child like wonder 🙂
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💗
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Again…I feel so connected to what you say. Thanks for sharing, Pragalbha…
Children in this age, and their concerns…
It scares me sometimes. Guess we need to keep an ear always open for them. 🍀🙏🍀
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It is gratifying that you truly hear me. I felt so speechless in my response to him… what a privilege that he would trust me and hoping to keep walking with him in curiosity, and perhaps see the sparks ignite for him when his world view expands. Right now I am only being careful not to rush it – it his journey. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughtful words, valuable contribution to me.
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Always a pleasure Pragalbha…🙏🙏
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A beautiful post Praghalba 🧡 We all respond differently to time and the world around us and it is lovely you can have these honest conversations with your son. My late grandmother studied medicine at a time when not many women did and she enthousiastically put all the extra hours in because it gave her meaning. She worked as a GP until she was 75 and continued to read all the medical journals until she was over a 100 years old. She was eternally curious, full of fun and adventure with many hobbies and interests. I hope your son will find an interest or a calling that will inspire him too! 💜
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I am very grateful for my son’s trust and these conversations when they happen. Thank you so much for taking the time to share about your grandmother. What an honor that you bring her inspiration to me. It is the likes of her who are trailblazers for generations to follow. I feel blessed to know about her amazing spirit. I too hope and pray that the young generation do not lose their spark to some very tough circumstances they are compelled to be in.
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Wow your grandmother is an inspiration
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Thank you kindly dear Bella, she was an amazing woman and very generous of spirit 💜
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😊
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Thank you for this PD 🙏 Such a insightful conversation and a great question! These big questions can change perspectives and life’s trajectory.
A few years ago I asked myself – What is most important to me … and then What do I want to organize my life around? Instead of fitting in yoga around my work schedule, I changed my work to fit around yoga. It opened up time and energy to really Be in the world.
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Dear Val, it is such a precious privilege to get to intersect these young minds. I am perhaps less than half equipped to be a parent, so I simply show up authentically. I learn so much myself from these conversations.
It opened up time and energy to really Be in the world – this what you say is what I am attempting and practicing more and more each day. Consciously scheduling the day and following the voice of inspiration like you share feels more important than ever.
Thank you so much, your response is a valuable contribution to me.
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Thank you PD for sharing how meaningful this has been. Your son will surely find his way with such loving guidance and an open heart.
Your authenticity and innate wisdom is such a gift for him and all the lives you touch 💕
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Much Love & Gratitude to you, thank you for being here _()_
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live well do tell
we may never pass this way again~
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That is very wise what you say. Whatever it is, we will never get it back so live it well. Thank you so much.
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Its really sad that children have so much to do these days. Especially now with the lockdown there’s absolutely no socializing and their lives are filled with online school, homework, tests and assignments. Its them and their computers. Hope things change and they too can go back so they can do more than being in front of a screen.
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Exactly that’s the life they are living as you describe. It has become the new normal as if, and trusting that better new normals are coming that are more aligned with their health and wellbeing. Thank you so much for your kind visit.
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Each phase in life has a different set of challenges to deal with. Guess sometimes the young minds get overwhelmed by the routine stuff they do at school. But he is lucky to have you around for a frank conversation and guidance. I am sure he will see the abundance that life has to offer in due course. Wishing him all the very best ♥️
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Very true Radhika 🙂 I am hoping too that he connects with the abundance of life, while trying not to rush or push it. Thank you very much.
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Profound post, Pragalbha and I completely agree with the way your son is feeling totally overburdened so he feels that time is passing so fast. All this will soon pass and in a nice way guide him towards what life is all about.
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Thank you so much for your kind visit always. I am trying not to rush him in his journey of how life and perceptions unfold for him. Very grateful for the opportunity of these conversations.
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You are always welcome dear Pragalbha and yes do not rush him in anything this is a vulnerable age for them. I have gone through similar situation with my son and from a young age too. He was a dyslexia child and have gone through a lot of hard times but in the end all has turned out well with guidance and support from God who knows best.
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So true. I am humbled and inspired by what you shared, thank you _()_
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You are welcome dear. Take care and stay safe ❤️❤️
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This pandemic really is tough for all, including the young ones. It is good he can talk to you. I this covid makes it hard for him to see where life is going, what can he do. Bless him. Big hug. I am sure when get older he will look back on his childhood and feel why did I say that I love life.
For me being with the Divine through meditation is what keeps me balanced
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You are right, the pandemic is making it very hard to see where life is going. Also he has always been very deeply perceptive, he has been asking about what’s the point of life since very young. It has been interesting to give him my perspective and then together looking at the contrasts in the world that we are attempting to live through in our own ways. I have admitted to him long back that I have not much choice to offer to him for the school structure, he will have to go through it until adulthood, knowing fully well that it is not entirely what defines him, there is more for him to uncover. Thank you so much for your love and blessings for him.
Yes conscious practice of being present to the Divine daily helps me too.
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Wow.. he is a deep thinker. I am sure that will lead him to do great deeds in his life.
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Kids at that age have no concept of what age is, Prag. I remember so clearly looking at my Mom one day who was in her thirties and declared to myself I would never get to be that old. Right! It’s a shame that our younger generations feel weighed down so heavily and I pray that lifts and soon. Our world has become so crazy. I will not let go of my faith that very real blessings are ahead of us that will include the whole world. Your son I believe will again be able to feel lighter despite all the schoolwork. Don’t loose hope for better days ahead and just keep on listening to the guidance of the Natural World. Give your son a big hug from me, OK? My heart so goes out to these kids today! xo
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It is indeed crazy in so many ways dear Amy. A lot of things absolutely make no sense to me in how they are done, and yet I have to keep silence as a parent to watch them go through it. I lack the capacity to give them any other alternatives. So I only attempt to offer my perspective that there is a lot more to the world than the limited version they seem to be locked in. They are opening up now, from – “the world doesn’t work like that mom!!” to “ok mom maybe but right now I can’t think like that” I am keeping full faith too that the Universe will open up and gobble up the unnecessary stuff and real blessings will come through. Thank you so much for your love and blessings.
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You are so welcome!! 💞
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Oh wow…I’m nearly 70, and yes life can be tedious at times (especially this year).. but during my life I have also enjoyed some glorious fun loving times and accumulated a treasure trove of happy memories, and I am expecting many more wonderful times to occur in my future…..
And thank you for following my blog/website, I hope you enjoy my humble writings, and I’m from Geelong, Australia. Cheers. Ivor,..
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So good to connect with you Ivor. Life is glorious I agree, even though tedious at times, there is so much to look forward to. Thank you for your kind visit here 🙂
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What important conversations to have with your son. I have to say, the first thing I thought of when your son said what he said about living a long life. I often have the thought that this life doesn’t last forever, and immediately follows the thought “thankfully!” I don’t have bad thoughts about life or any wish whatsoever for it to end. But I think I was born with an understanding of the ‘time’ we have here. I am constantly aware of it, and constantly aware it is fleeting. Well, those were the thoughts I connected with while reading this. 🙂
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You picked up on something that I rarely get to connect with anyone, you get it like only you do. One thing that impresses upon me is that my son says these things calmly with a smile. He genuinely is trying to understand this.
I absolutely relate to the sense of relief from the reminder that this doesn’t last forever. There is so much aliveness in that realization.
Just like you say, I didn’t sense negativity in my son’s query. and neither am I waiting for it to end, I have so much to look forward to.
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts, so much joy of validation for me!
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Thank YOU Infinite. Not everyone understands this. I felt relief in reading your original post and your comment.
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Absolute pleasure and privilege to connect with you.
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❤️ I reciprocate those feelings.
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Thank you for sharing such a beautiful conversation. Filled with honesty and soulfulness
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That you see honesty and soulfulness in this is my joy and happiness. Thank you very much for your kind visit. I look forward to getting to know your work and continued interaction.
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This was a beautiful read! Thank you for sharing. 💙
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Thank you so much for your kind visit and time.
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Well, one thing I can say is I agree with your son. I’d decided long ago (like him) that 80 is around the age I think enough is enough of this being.
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This speaks to me on so many different levels and I recognize your thoughts and were you find yourself at this point of the journey. For us, the days seem too short to juggle everything as we get burdened down by responsibilities. I think you are reevaluating, simplifying life. Hopeful to find new ways and means to make it happen. Your son hasn’t learned those lessons yet and he too feels the days are too short. You are at different points of the journey and yet at similar crossroads. Sending a big hug your way.
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So well said – different points of the journey and similar crossroads. It is such happiness to share this with him. Thank you my friend for visiting here and sharing your thoughts.
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I can only imagine and this will be the memories that you will both hold on to. Bless you both.
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Since the tender age of ten, I’ve felt as though I’ve been living for a long, long time. Not old… just ageless. For me, life still seems long now, yet most days seem short. As a teenager, my days AND my life seemed long. When I hear others say, “Time flies by,” I always wonder if they are expressing their true perception of time, or if they are just repeating a cliché.
It’s wonderful that you can have such deep conversations with your son, Pragalbha. Thank you for the thought-provoking post.
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I can totally relate to the word ‘ageless’ Sometimes I feel I have lost the ability to measure time in the real sense. I have been around for very long it seems. The day just is – and it is gone for another one to come. Until there would be none, for me in this physical sense. It is so wonderful to read about your perceptions and mine came alive again 🙂
Yes I am very grateful for this opportunity with him. Thank you very much dear Magarisa.
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You’re welcome, my friend. I’m happy to exchange our perceptions of time and age. 🙂
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Thank you for sharing this. It is so relevant to most of us in the current situation. I wouldn’t really know if someone told me that because I have my own days, some of them I believe in living and trying to do what I am supposed to be doing, but then some of those days I feel like your son feels. But I am happy that there is this conversation that can happen between the two of you.
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I am happy you found this relatable Moushmi, and grateful for the opportunity of this conversation to. Thank you for your lovely visit.
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The self-discovery path is something I want to explore and so relatable. You gently stroke the reflection in all of us and a call to action, without driving self to the wall. Empowering Pragalbha.
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That is such beautiful kind appreciation, makes me happy. Thank you very much Vishal.
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I’m not receiving your posts in my readers 😦
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Ohh that would be my loss! Perhaps you can try unfollow and follow back?
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such thoughtful words – i suppose its the monotony that makes life seem draggy – while or those who have varied tasks it passes too fast – well written and love your flow of thoughts
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Thank you very much for your kind visit and appreciation.
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So many young people right now especially teenagers are finding these restrictions so difficult.. They have to be entertained amused and occupied or else they are bored.. 🙂 I know my Granddaughter who is ten to day is the same… ‘I am bored’ and yet time for us is speeding… Yet is it time speeding, no… its just our awareness, our perception and as we ourselves vibrate at higher levels… we lose track of time all together..
Age, is but a number… I am sure too your son is an old soul who has a wise head on young shoulders… His take on Life is that Age is going to stretch out into the future, and at the moment as time is dragging for him.. He sees that journey as endless into the future….
Yet we both know how fast those 15 yrs have flown… My own children in their 40’s and where did those years go… I have no idea….. For within a flash… from babies to teens to adults without the memories would be gone,
So for us Life is short… While their days are long….
A beautiful muse dear Pragalbha…. Thank you for sharing your thoughts….
Much love dear friend ❤
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So wonderful to read this through your view – created a clear image of the difference of perception for these young hearts and ours, even better than before.
I am particularly realizing more so that all those times that I had felt to be excruciatingly difficult are but a mere flash of a memory and with the clarity emerging continually life seems short to live it in better ways. Thank you so much for your kind presence and time truly.
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my pleasure ❤
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