How long was I gone?

Did I go on a long break?

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Photo by myself from a personal retreat in 2015

I have been on this unintended and unplanned break from this blog space. Sometimes I thought I knew why I was away and sometimes I wondered why. It feels more like being in response to the Greater Continuum of Life. It is surrender to where and how I am called to be, on a daily basis.

I am so grateful for the loving kind inquiries on my well being and whereabouts. You, my friends from this blog world, are as real a contribution to me as any other. You truly nourish the soil on which I find my ground to be Here.

The beauty of the space I have been in

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Photo by myself (unedited) : Crater lake, Oregon – the incredible clarity

I found myself letting go of all particular ways of how I spent my time of the day. It led me to venture into new avenues of life and become more consciously present & engaged in the familiar avenues of life. It gave me clarity on exactly how I am a contribution to my relations, my intention, how my purpose is getting shaped. I kept wanting to be back here in time, I had so much to say, yet no urge to write.

My ability to allow life to come to me and follow exactly as guided from within, has deepened more than ever. I finally feel no judgment over what looks productive, or not, in the world out there. The choice of simply Being, living life without the pressure of Doing, is coming more easily to me. I found myself in a profound wave of contemplating, clearly seeing, digesting and integrating all aspects of my life and being, towards a sense of coherence. It is unfolding in incredible ways. It is amazing.

I feel the process of grounding and the blooming of ease & joy alive in me. There is no rushing about this process. It is slow and luxurious. It yields abundantly with the time and space it provides me to grow and just Be. 

Blog Anniversary

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Photo by myself

My first blog post was dated October 5, 2015.  All this time seems to be magical and unreal. I entered this space not knowing what blogging meant, what it took and what could be done with it. I simply needed a place to rest the force that was pulsating within. A trusted friend suggested WordPress, dear husband set up this site for me in one day and I posted my first poetry. The name of the blog, the description of About page – all of it came without any thought or plan. I put my fingers to keys and the words simply came. The description on the About page feels so innocent and newly, deeply meaningful to me today, as I celebrate 4 years of being here, on October 5. 2019.

It took a while for this space to change from a scared place to a sacred space for me. The love and understanding I received from interactions here, wrapped around my heart and helped me thrive.

That was a time when poetry had become a living breathing part of me. Poetry doesn’t visit me anymore as of now. Poetry, as if lovingly conveyed to me that it was time for me to visit life in a different role. I had felt a lot of grief when I thought poetry was leaving me. I even wrote a poem named “What if poetry never comes through me again” (https://pragalbhadoshi.wordpress.com/…/what-if-poetry-neve…/). I did write some more poetry after that as the flow trickled to a stop.

I love the richness of this yet another new life that I am living and also look back at my poet self fondly. Poetry knows the perfect time to come through again.

I trust the process

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Photo by Manish Doshi

I am in the process of integrating all parts of me into one self and embarking on this training ground for compassion, kindness, love, acceptance and courage to live with the truth of my being. It does take me through difficult bends, unskilled as I am – they are lessons I am supported and guided through.

Comfort is not a requirement, and joy is guaranteed in choosing alignment with universal humanity.

I now allow all different realities of life unfolding into one beautiful, magical, miraculous tapestry of life and its expression waiting to be channeled through me.

I would love to hear your thoughts my dear friends. I will find my way to your work and get to as much as I can. I truly missed you all. I will post next when the inspiration strikes me again! 🙂

103 thoughts on “How long was I gone?

  1. Happy anniversary dear Pragalbha and so lovely to see you here again! 🙂💜 It sounds as if you’ve embarked on a profound journey and it’s asking you to go with flow. Poetry will always be there and it’s healthy to stretch and rest the writing mind in different ways. We wish you a beautiful journey with many blessings 🤗💖 xxx

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  2. Four years of beautiful words and thoughtful posts. Congrats on reaching the milestone. I have seen many bloggers come and go, and I was always hoping you would remain. You described perfectly the feeling many bloggers can relate to – initially viewing their blog as a scary place, unsure of the future, to realising it’s sacred.
    It seems you are on a wonderful journey. I love your line: “to live with the truth of my being.”

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    • Dear Laura, you have been with me for so long, I am ever so grateful to have crossed paths with you here. Thank you for reading my lines and lifting them up. Your words for me, give me a smile and support my way back here 🙂

      Like

  3. Happy to see you posting the journey en route rich , profound, slow-but-luxurious evolving experiences, a journey from scared to sacred ! The search for that universal goodness & its alignment with the core truth, nature , is a joy to be in.
    Happy writing & happy blessed times.

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  4. I love how you described your inner journey of simply being and allowing yourself to be!! This is beautiful!! I love how you have honored your time away!!

    I too have taken a hiatus from blogging and will be returning! I’m putting the last write and polish to a new book and am going to allow the universe to lead me on the publishing journey and just see where it goes!

    I feel anxiety has slipped away and I’m able to enjoy the process of living life, so I’m luxuriating in this feeling like a cat in a ray of sunshine! It’s glorious isn’t it?!

    Peace,
    Tamara

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  5. Congrats on your blogging anniversary Pragalbha. And even moreso on your relaxed, trusting way of living. I’ve had periods when I lived more in the flow, focused on being, presence, etc. Kudos on finding your way into this graceful way of living. May it continue to flow. Blessings, Brad

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    • Thank you very much for your wishes.
      What you say is meaningful to me – I have had periods when I lived more in the flow – because I recognize how raw a practice it is keep going that way. It is way easier to slip into older models than to stay alert at it. I appreciate the ease I have arrived at, as a gift of this time. I receive your wishes – May it continue to flow.

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  6. To answer your question. Too long.
    Blogging is a wonderful thing, but at times it can get in the way of our journey in life.
    It is wonderful to hear from you. Let life take you to al of the wonderful places you
    have yet to explore.

    Happy blog anniversary.
    Hope you and yours are well.

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  7. It’s lovely to see some thoughts from you again..It’s good that you’ve taken time away to allow space for other experiences and ways of being to enter your life. Things have been similar for me in recent times, and I’ve found that some ways of being creative have moved away or changed….poem writing included. Creativity in all its forms can’t be forced….coming as it does from somewhere in the ether. All these things return and come and go and change throughout life. I wish you happiness and peace in whatever you’re doing… Mairi xx

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    • Thank you so much for this beautiful acknowledgement and affirmation of this experience by you. I have loved your poetry – it carries the essence with such beauty and simplicity. Yes none of it can be forced, forms of creativity coming through are such gifts. Wish you too all the true joys of the process 💛

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  8. Welcome back from what looks like, a beautiful journey! In the past year, my poetry and prose has been coming through periodically due to the passing of my father last year. When the words come, I am grateful…
    It’s lovely to read your words here again and I’m looking forward to reading more!

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    • Thank you Frank 🙂 It is so really from scared to sacred. I was fortunate to visit Oregon and spend a day at Crater lake during the summer. That picture is a simple mobile click from a trail. That blue felt incredible to me.

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  9. Such calming words, PD. I can almost sense that state of calm and peace from where these words seem to flow…involved, yet completely detached. Strangely, it has been on my mind also…what happens when the words stop…will it create a void within…or will an existing void have been filled. Maybe the flow of words stops when its true purpose is over…Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I know I will return to read this a few times more. Best wishes to you!

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    • Your comment gave me a teary smile my friend 🙂
      I love how you see the possibility of an existing void being filled. It hadn’t occured to me and so experienced grief. Words do serve a purpose when they come, what a gift! It took me a while to learn that I am being led to discover the purpose beyond where I had become comfortable staying. Thank you for your wishes and this opportunity for a thoughtful conversation.

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  10. You are so very welcome back Pragalbha. Such a magical writer you are. I just realised that I involuntarily begin to focus on my breathing while reading you beautifully flowing nuggets of words. Perhaps it reminds me my den where I meditate. Keep discovering, and evolving… we all need to trust the process.

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    • You gave me a very happy smile my friend :))) Thank you so much for dipping into the magic, and letting me know it brings you to focus on your breath – what a joy to know. So wonderful that you have your meditation den. We all need a cave of our own where we train ourselves to trust the process.

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  11. Oh I have missed you! Firstly, congrats on your blogging anniversary. Secondly, it sounds as if you have really gone through a beautiful change in life.

    I can imagine you feeling a bit sad that poetry has left you. May be, it has healed you? I was reading a book on writing,, in that the author said, dont fix ourself to one style of writing, because it keeps more engaged and newness remains. I dont classify myself a writer, in fact i sm cluess about the different genres,thats why i am reading a book writing lol.

    I think this post of yours is lovely snd beautiful way to express yourself.
    I loved it sll..but.. thid para really is beautiful and profound.. ”
    The choice of simply Being, living life without the pressure of Doing, is coming more easily to me. I found myself in a profound wave of contemplating, clearly seeing, digesting and integrating all aspects of my life and being, towards a sense of coherence. It is unfolding in incredible ways. It is amazing….”

    I love to read what ever you write! It doesnt have to be poetry,, just a simple realisation of life shared by you us always wonderful to read and learn from.

    Lovely to hear from you and see you soon.

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  12. Happy belated blog anniversary, Pragalbha! I’m so happy to see you here again.
    Although Poetry doesn’t visit you anymore, your words still emanate such peace and joy. I also took an unplanned break from writing/blogging, but it was difficult for me to accept my lack of inspiration to write. Your post has encouraged me to continue along the path of acceptance and surrender. Thank you, dear friend.

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    • I feel such delight to interact with you after so long Magarisa !!😊 Thank you for your wishes and your thoughtful words for me. I understand the difficulty you share – it took me time to land here with peace. I am so glad that my post is a contribution to you. Acceptance and surrender opens us up for greater possibilities beyond where we become comfortable – I wish you the best of ease and joy for exactly how it needs to unfold for you.

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  13. I relate to your blogging experience. I started not known if what a blog was and I can’t quite believe I am still writing.
    Thank you for reading and reflecting on my poems.
    Congratulations on listening to your inner voice and taking time to grow in a way that fills your cup.

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  14. Welcome back and you were missed. I love the way you have conveyed your thoughts …..it portrays a certain ease . You seem to embrace what life has in store for you and there can be nothing more calming than that …….I trust the process is my favorite phase ❤️ bravo 👏

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  15. Many people are coming out from ‘doing’ and simply living and enjoying life by ‘being’. That’s where you have found yourself in lately; immersed in the beauty around you. The concept of ‘time’ almost non-existent. Enjoy your journey. Isn’t that why we’re here? Big hug to you!! 💗🌼⭐️🌈

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  16. kudos for your profound journey so well expressed here … it resonates deeply with me as I have have done years of solitary retreat and it’s the best way to grow 🙂

    Very pleased your have guidance, it’s essential.

    We started blogging at the same time. I follow you but haven’t received these posts or that last poem. Will unfollow and try again and hope they feed into my reader 🙂

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  17. “The choice of simply Being, living life without the pressure of Doing, is coming more easily to me. I found myself in a profound wave of contemplating, clearly seeing, digesting and integrating all aspects of my life and being, towards a sense of coherence. It is unfolding in incredible ways. It is amazing.”
    The introspection and reflection has infused your soul with a profound clarity Pragalbha. Your mature and profound thoughts continue to inspire me .
    Congratulations on your blog anniversary. 🙂 Wishing you many more. Keep writing….i am sure the inspiration will flow!

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  18. No words describe adequately all I wish to convey to you. What a sacred and Holy Journey you have been on! So many changes. And you are listening and flowing instead of resisting. Oh that is so beautiful! Trusting the process is so uncomfortable at times, troubling, and at times deeply scary. Yet the growth is golden. I look eagerly forward to watching where next your feet lead you and your heart directs you. Congratulations on the blog anniversary. Amazing this journey is, isn’t it? I too went from scared to sacred. Bless you for honoring you, Prag. (((HUGS)))!!! xoxo

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    • Dear Amy, I am soaking in the words of assurance you give me. They give me so much more trust. Yes, it is so uncomfortable at times because there is nothing to ‘show’ for the changes, the tremendous shifts 🙂 The growth is golden indeed …I am watching too, the curve I am on isn’t evident in the moment – I am in continual discernment for when to take a step and when to sit back and be carried by Divine Inspiration. Amazing journey yes, and I am ever so grateful to have connected with you in this space. Love of the Infinite kind to you.

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  19. I enjoyed learning about how you started blogging, and how ‘at ease’ you’ve become in your personal flow as you embrace these connections which are, as you say, a real contribution to your being. How wonderful to have to you back and share glimpses of your retreat. I hope to arrive here one day, “My ability to allow life to come to me and follow exactly as guided from within, has deepened more than ever. I finally feel no judgment over what looks productive, or not, in the world out there.“ While once
    I used to attend meditation retreats, now I have a child, and my life is incredibly different, and my need to be in the world for her, even more prominent. I still think I can find ways to incorporate all that I learned from my “old life” into my new one, and ways where I can open up to beautiful gorgeous (such as the blue depth in your lake image) and glorious unknowns. By the way, I have access consciousness bars practitioners who have found their way into my other worlds and yet we haven’t had time to schedule a trade! Go figure.

    Really love your energy Pragal! You’re a delight and I am grateful for when we meet here!

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    • Dear Ka, it is a gift to read your comment my friend 🙂 You are in the most wondrous miraculous journey of life with your child – spending time and nurturing her pure soul is magical I feel, my boys are grown teenagers now 🙂 I don’t get to formal personal retreats very often, some days just become retreat like when I get to choose to be with myself deeply – while life whirls around me. Just like you say, so much of the “old life” can be a contribution to our new one.

      I am so thrilled to know that you have crossed paths with more Bars Practitioners! Wwit for all of you to find the schedule for a trade with absolute ease? Everything that doesn’t allow…rwgbpodpoc… So amazing to share Access lingo with you 🙂 Access questions have become a part of me as if, and I still find my way into the Tour of Consciousness videos by Dain Heer from time to time. What else is possible? Much Love & Joy to you!

      I

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      • Oh yes… November trades are likely, tentative schedule. SO much else is flowing right now! All of life comes to me with ease and grace and glory! Also you shortened the AC clearing statement! So perfect! I love how you expanded upon the statement by making it even more “bite-sized.” Can’t wait to meet you some day in person, my friend! How does it get any better than this?! I agree with it becoming a part of us. I discovered Access Consciousness almost a decade ago, and for me – I move very slowly… going deeper, living freer 🙂 Much love to you, Infinite!

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  20. Sometimes break is needed to get once again rejuvenated. But it’s a pleasure to read your wonderful blog. It’s takes a great effort to build a good blog and you have done it well in all these years. Surely must have created many beautiful memories in your way of writing and communicating with other bloggers. Congratulations on your blog anniversary.

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  21. Thank you for sharing your reflections and insights PD. Welcome back 💕
    I too have slowed down and priorities seem to be shifting along with the season.. or perhaps bigger things. Usually I am inspired to create new experiences and explore at this time of year, but now I get a sense of letting go and letting be.
    Just being in my being suits me well right now. A slowing of the flow and a nourishing of the soul feels good.
    Enjoy this part of your journey my friend 🙏

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  22. This is a beautiful post and where you were in Oregon is astonishing. I could stay there for months! This part, “I finally feel no judgment over what looks productive, or not, in the world out there” really resonated with me, but in a different way. I am still focused on doing, but I don’t care much what others think about what it is I’m doing.

    Glad you’re back in this space ❤

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    • Yes astonished is exactly how I felt about the blue color of the waters of Crater lake, Oregon! 🙂 I feel like I have to return there at some point in life again.
      I think where I am is a good platform for me to progress to the next one – it would be where you are, not caring much about others’ perception of what I am doing, but doing because it is my calling – having that more a part of my being than it is now. Thank you so much for your kind support on my way 💛

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  23. Happy belated anniversary to you and your amazing blog.
    You have no idea how many times I visited here and found you still gone. I guess that’s because your writing is really good and captivating.
    May the inspiration strikes again.
    I can’t keep on scrolling through your old posts looking for those I’ve never seen😆

    Lots of love and support ❣

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  24. Dearest Pragalbha.. I too have been on an extended much longer break from WP than I originally intended. And like you are just following the flow to BE and those instincts which kick us back in our blogs as and when we feel the inclination..

    Wonderful to learn about your beginnings of your blog and October too was my anniversary as I was informed upon my return…

    I am so pleased we have met through this media my friend and that we are both listening to our inner guidance of our Higher selves to take that time out to explore and evolve our Higher selves that little bit more..

    Changes are happening so swift in all corners of the globe.. And the only permanent thing we can change is that of ourselves.. As we find our own balance within…
    As we mature, grow, let go of our ego, to be content within the space of our Being..
    I feel we are the balance keepers… Strange as that may sound… We see the conflict, the turmoil, we have learnt to step back observing instead of getting involved in stories..
    We are going within our cores back to our centres to breathe deeper that peace which we all search for, yet so many are still scrambling outside of themselves to find it..
    While we have learnt to settle back within our own space as we close our eyes to experience the Peace within…

    Sending so much love my friend… Keep in that flow of your own creative spirit, as I will mine…
    We have been learning we no longer need to feel obligated to anything other than our inner calling and prompting..
    Taking each day as it comes.. I too explore my creativity and do not plan my day other than how it arrives and feels.. In this regard I am extremely lucky now I am retired to be able to do this..
    But its bringing with it a new sense of inner freedom and joy…
    And that is what we are missing in life.. As many are not happy within,.. Many are searching externally in ‘Things’ when the real gold is when we honour our hearts and reconnect to its love..

    Much love dear friend… And stay blessed… ❤ ❤ ❤

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    • How blessed I feel to have found you here and to have this soul friendship with you! Your words are very supporting and grounding to me.

      The changes around …and for me within, seem too rapid. I am going through such enormous shifts and transitions that the only way to hold steady is to stay slow and still as much possible. Also it is still a busy phase of family life for me with staying consciously available. Taking each day as it comes still becomes very full unknowingly. So I am attempting to carve out my focus and purpose, with deep listening and simple living.

      Happy October Anniversary to both of us ❤️

      Stepping back and observing the stories, getting to the core of our being, breathing deeply, explore and evolve our higher self that little bit more – all of it makes tremendous sense to me – thank you for this powerful reinforcement.

      I have to admit that I still operate on a lot of conditioning of obligation in some other areas of life – it is very dense, yet in a way protective/comforting for me – if that makes sense. While it gives me some stability, it robs me of my feeling of true joy and freedom. I guess that is why I am walled from certain inspirations. I am grateful and content knowing I am immersed in the process of unfolding and growing towards my inner calling – I trust, accept and enjoy where I am.

      What a delight to pour my heart to you my friend, thank you for taking the time to visit. I look forward to reading from you, will visit sometime next week.

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